Mehfil-e-Rashid محفلِ رشید
GHAZAL VII

The Quiet House

خامشی سے پہلے

Khāmushī Se Pahle

The Story

I felt that because of my scientific understanding of his age and ailments, I was prepared. I played it out in my mind many times, and always I thought I would be stoic. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Once the funeral was done and the people left, I realized what I had lost. I was the son who knew everything and understood nothing, until the house went quiet. And over all of it, unseen until it lifted, was his dua; that cannot be stressed enough.

  1. I was the man who always knew, until the house went quiet;
    I sorted the false from the true, until the house went quiet.

    مجھے تو فخر تھا کہ علم تھا تمام، خامشی سے پہلے
    پرکھتا تھا درست کو اور خام، خامشی سے پہلے

    mujhe to fakhr thā ki ʿilm thā tamām, khāmushī se pahle
    parakhtā thā durust ko aur khām, khāmushī se pahle

    I was so proud that my knowledge was complete; I sorted the sound from the flawed, before the silence.

  2. I had the science of his age, his ailments, and their answers;
    I held the ending like a clue, until the house went quiet.

    عمر، علل، دوا: سبھی حساب میرے دفتروں میں تھے
    پڑھا تھا میں نے موت کا نظام، خامشی سے پہلے

    ʿumr, ʿilal, davā: sabhī hisāb mere daftaroṅ meṅ the
    paṛhā thā maiṅ ne maut kā nizām, khāmushī se pahle

    Age, ailments, medicine: all the accounts sat in my files; I had read death's whole system, before the silence.

  3. My days kept blooming out of season; I called it my fortune,
    nor asked inside whose prayer I grew, until the house went quiet.

    نہ پوچھا کس دعا کے سائے میں مرے دن پھولتے تھے
    سمجھتا تھا اسے محنت کا انعام، خامشی سے پہلے

    na pūchā kis duʿā ke sāye meṅ mire din phūlte the
    samajhtā thā use mehnat kā inʿām, khāmushī se pahle

    I never asked in whose prayer's shade my days were blooming; I took it for hard work's reward, before the silence.

  4. I stood at knowledge all my life the way one stands at windows;
    I thought the window was the view, until the house went quiet.

    نگاہ عمر بھر دریچے پر کھڑی رہی میری
    دیا دریچے کو منظر کا مقام، خامشی سے پہلے

    nigāh ʿumr bhar darīche par khaṛī rahī merī
    diyā darīche ko manzar kā maqām, khāmushī se pahle

    My gaze stood at the window all my life; I gave the window the rank of the view, before the silence.

  5. The funeral filled every room with shoulders, food, and murmurs;
    then one by one the world withdrew, until the house went quiet.

    جنازے سے بھرا تھا گھر: کندھے تھے، اشک تھے، باتیں تھیں
    پھر اک اک کر کے رخصت ہو گئے سلام، خامشی سے پہلے

    janāze se bharā thā ghar: kandhe the, ashk the, bāteṅ thīṅ
    phir ik ik kar ke rukhsat ho gaye salām, khāmushī se pahle

    The house was full with the funeral: shoulders, tears, talk; then one by one the salaams took their leave, before the silence.

  6. He taught you all your life, Imran; you thought the course was over;
    your one true lesson wasn't due, until the house went quiet.

    وہ عمر بھر پڑھاتے رہے؛ تُو سمجھا سبق ہے ختم، عمرانؔ
    ملا نہ تھا وہ آخری پیغام، خامشی سے پہلے

    wo ʿumr bhar paṛhāte rahe; tū samjhā sabaq hai khatm, Imrān
    milā na thā wo ākhirī paighām, khāmushī se pahle

    He kept teaching all his life; you thought the lesson was done, Imran; that final message had not arrived, before the silence.